Bringing common sense with a grain of salt back to parenting!
We might think signing kids up for every class will make them “well-rounded.” Actually, when preschoolers are busier than CEOs, they lose out on creativity, rest, and the simple joy of being little.
Mistake: Treating childhood like a résumé that must be built by age five.
Consequence: Your preschooler’s Google Calendar has more color-coded blocks than yours.
Reality Check: A few activities are great. A jam-packed schedule? Exhausting for everyone — especially the child.
Soccer at 3:30. Ballet at 4:15. Piano at 5. Dinner squeezed in at 6 — if traffic cooperates. Sound familiar? Today’s preschoolers are living like mini-executives, shuffled from one “enrichment” to another. The irony: overscheduling doesn’t just drain parents — it robs kids of downtime, imagination, and joy. Let's look at how to recognize when “opportunity” tips into overload, and why sometimes less might actually give them more.
THE ISSUE
In the span of a single generation, preschool life went from “finger-painting and playground time” to “structured calendar rivaling a Fortune 500 CEO.”
It starts innocently. You sign your child up for soccer because they love running around. Then a parent at pickup casually mentions their child is also in ballet. Suddenly you’re Googling leotards. Then comes piano (“music helps brain development”), Mandarin (“global skills”), STEM lab (“because jobs of the future”), and maybe gymnastics (“coordination and confidence!”).
Before you know it, your four-year-old has more extracurriculars than you did in high school. Their day looks like this:
8:00 AM: Preschool drop-off.
3:30 PM: Soccer practice.
4:15 PM: Ballet.
5:00 PM: Piano.
6:00 PM: Quick dinner.
6:30 PM: STEM enrichment lab.
7:30 PM: Collapse into bed (yours, not theirs — they’re still bouncing).
And you? You’re living in your car, armed with Goldfish crackers, reusable water bottles, and a color-coded Google Calendar worthy of an air traffic controller.
The kicker: kids at this age don’t even know what a “résumé” is. They just know they’re being shuttled from place to place when all they really wanted was to play with blocks or dig for worms in the backyard.
WHY PARENTS DO THIS
Overscheduling doesn’t happen because parents are villains twirling their mustaches while plotting their next nefarious scheme. It happens because of love, fear, and cultural pressure.
Fear of falling behind. We hear all the time that the first years are “critical windows” for brain development. Suddenly, every missed activity feels like a missed opportunity to set them up for success.
Peer pressure. At pickup, parents casually compare: “Oh, we just came from Mandarin class before soccer.” Nobody wants their child to be the only one “missing out.”
Social media optics. Posting recital photos, trophies, or certificates looks impressive. It’s like proof of “good parenting” — or at least “busy parenting.”
Adult productivity bias. We measure our worth by busyness. Subconsciously, we think: if kids are busy too, they must be thriving.
Guilt outsourcing. If we can’t play with them every second, classes and coaches ease the guilt. At least someone is stimulating them, right?
The myth of “well-rounded.” We think piling on activities creates balance. Ironically, overscheduling tips kids off balance entirely.
HOW THIS HARMS CHILDREN (AND US)
Overloaded preschool schedules lead to:
Exhaustion. Preschoolers need downtime. When their days rival executives’, they melt down. (And unlike executives, they can’t fix it with espresso.)
Stifled creativity. The best inventions of childhood happen in boredom: building forts, making up songs, staring at ants. Overscheduling leaves no room for that.
Stress replacing joy. Soccer isn’t fun when it’s wedged between ballet and piano. Kids start to see activities as duties, not delights.
Lack of self-direction. When every hour is planned, kids never learn to decide what to do with unstructured time.
Parental burnout. You become a chauffeur with a snack bag, a clipboard, and the faint smell of Goldfish crackers in your car upholstery.
Fragile motivation. Kids learn to rely on external structure. Left alone, they panic at “nothing to do.”
Family disconnection. Evenings become logistics marathons instead of relaxed family time. Everyone’s together, but no one’s really together.
AVOIDING THE TRAP
The answer isn’t banning activities. It’s choosing wisely, balancing enrichment with rest, and remembering that play is just as valuable as piano.
1. Pick One Anchor Activity at a Time
A five-year-old doesn’t need a LinkedIn profile listing “soccer, Mandarin, piano, ballet, and STEM.” They need afternoons to build blanket forts.
Instead of piling on, choose one activity per season (example: soccer in the fall, ballet in winter, swim lessons in summer). This gives variety over time without turning your child into a frazzled commuter.
2. Ask: Whose Dream Is This?
Check motivation. Is your child begging for dance class, or are you secretly reliving your unfulfilled ballerina dreams? If your kid lights up at music, great. If they cry before every practice, maybe piano can wait. (Activities should serve your child’s joy — not your nostalgia or résumé anxiety.)
3. Guard White Space Like Gold
Treat downtime as sacred. Schedule free afternoons the same way you’d schedule soccer.
Because “nothing” time is when cardboard boxes become castles and siblings invent bizarre new games with rules only they understand.
4. Watch Their Energy, Not the Calendar
Forget the Instagram brag posts — trust your kid’s mood. If they’re melting down every Tuesday at ballet, that’s data. Their brain and body are saying: enough. (Kids' energy levels are better indicators than calendars.)
5. Depth Over Breadth
One loved activity beats five half-hearted ones.
Kids learn perseverance when they stick with something they enjoy. Overscheduling turns them into dabblers who never get to feel mastery.
6. Model Balance Yourself
If you live in chaos, kids assume chaos is the standard. Show them you can say no, rest, and enjoy unstructured time.
Parents who respect balance raise kids who do too.
7. Say No to FOMO
Fear of missing out drives the enrichment race. But here’s the truth: kids don’t need everything. They need enough — and then space to breathe, snack, and maybe lie on the floor staring at the ceiling fan.
8. Redefine Achievement
A child laughing in the backyard counts more than one who can say “hello” in Mandarin but cries every afternoon. Stop measuring by trophies, recitals, or certificates. Ask instead: Are they happy? Curious? Rested?
THE PAYOFF
When you loosen the schedule, you win back more than just free time:
Kids rediscover imagination — inventing games, creating art, exploring on their own.
They grow confident — learning to handle unstructured time.
Parents reclaim sanity — less chauffeuring, fewer logistics marathons.
Families reconnect — shared downtime becomes bonding time.
One day you might hear your kids' laughter drifting in from the backyard, their clothes streaked with grass, completely absorbed in a game they’ve decided to call “Super Worm Explorers.” And in that moment it will be clear they never needed that extra hour of ballet, or Mandarin, or STEM. What they needed was the freedom to just be kids.
Because the goal of childhood isn’t to be “well-rounded.” It’s to be free enough to roll around — in grass, in imagination, in joy.
© Kristijan Musek Lešnik, 2025
