Parenting Life-Hacks: Avoiding The "Being the Cool Parent (Who is Actually Cringe)" Trap

Parents want to stay connected to their teens — but sometimes, in the attempt to be “cool,” they land squarely in cringe territory. Teens don’t need us to master TikTok dances or invade their group chats. What they need is a steady adult who respects their boundaries while staying interested.

Because teens already live in a state of permanent second-hand embarrassment. When parents try to be their peers, it might throw them into cringe overload.

“Teens don’t need you to master TikTok slang — they need you to respect their space while staying authentically you.”

AVOIDING THE TRAP

You don’t need to master slang or TikTok to connect. You just need to respect boundaries and show up as yourself.

• Be Curious, Not Clingy. Ask about their shows, music, or hobbies — but let them lead. A genuine “What do you love about that song?” goes farther than quizzing them on slang.

• Respect the “Friends Only” Spaces. If they say a hangout isn’t for parents, believe them. No surprise drop-ins with pizza. (They won’t eat it. They’ll eat their resentment.)

• Share Your Own World Too. You don’t have to cosplay as a teen. Invite them into your interests — whether it’s cooking, hiking, or your obsession with 80s ballads. Authentic beats performance.

• Keep Social Media Respectful. Ask before posting photos or stories. Teens don’t want their acne immortalized on Facebook for your high school classmates.

• Embrace Your Own Lane. Your value isn’t in blending in. It’s in being the adult they can count on — the one who doesn’t need to crash the group chat to feel relevant.

• Learn, But Don’t Perform. It’s fine to understand their slang or trends. Just don’t perform them like you’re auditioning for Hip Parent Idol.

• Model Self-Confidence. Show them what it looks like to be comfortable in your own skin. That’s the kind of “cool” that lasts.

MISTAKES TO AVOID

• Dropping into their online spaces and leaving “funny” comments.

• Dressing like their friends to blend in (they notice).

• Turning their hobbies into your personal brand.

• Oversharing their private lives for laughs.

• Saying “When I was your age…” before every story.

Like our parenting posters? Save or share them freely — just tag @Aparenttly.

The less you try to be cool, the cooler you actually become.

Trying hard to be the cool parent usually doesn't make us cool. It makes us cringe.

Cool parents don’t try to be cool. They just pay for pizza.

Every time parents misuse slang, a teen dies inside.

Go to longer version of this article

© dr. Kristijan Musek Lešnik & Aparenttly. All text and visuals are original works.

Sharing is welcomed. Reposting or reproduction without credit is not permitted. Please tag @Aparenttly when sharing.