Parenting Life-Hacks: Avoiding The "Early Teenager Myth" Trap

dr. Kristijan Musek Lešnik
Oct 17, 2025
2 min read

Some parents treat tweens like mini-adults, expecting responsibility, emotional regulation, and foresight that just isn’t there yet. Others keep them infantilized, assuming they’re too fragile, immature, or incompetent to handle even small responsibilities. Neither works. Both backfire.

“They’re not toddlers, but they’re not teenagers either. They’re tweens. And that messy, awkward in-between deserves its own parenting strategy.”

AVOIDING THE TRAP

The key is understanding the specifics of tween years:

Embrace the In-Between. Say it out loud: “They’re not little anymore, but not a teen yet either. They’re in-between — and that’s okay.”Permission to be awkward = relief.
Give Age-Appropriate Independence. Let them walk to the store, make sandwiches, or manage chores. Not everything. Not nothing. (Hint: if they can code Roblox but not butter toast, something’s off.)
Allow Safe Failures. Forget homework once, burn grilled cheese, miss the bus. Growth comes through small mistakes with soft landings.
Keep Rituals Alive. They may roll their eyes, but tweens still love family traditions — bedtime reading, Friday pizza, goofy rituals.
Talk About Bodies and Feelings. Puberty is messy. Normalize it. If you don’t, TikTok will (probably not in a way that would be comfortable for you.)
Set Boundaries With Compassion. Say no, but explain why. Tweens crave fairness almost as much as Wi-Fi.
Let Them Be Silly. Cartoons, slime, pillow forts. They’re still kids — let them play.
Respect Their “Almost Grown” Moments. Privacy matters: texting friends, picking clothes, choosing music. Independence is a muscle — let them flex it.